Ravenonmars

But cardio on the couch does sound fun...

Talking with you is my favorite thing...

You still in NY?

When do you go home?

Ahh... what else are you doing while you're there?

Sounds chill. Was just curious if you had plans to see anything while you're there.

Ill be staying home wishing you were next to me 😅

Id rather be with you. I've never been to NY

I collect postcards. Im trying to get all 50 states.... i don't have NY yet.

Im going to Florida in like 3 weeks. Idk how much of a vacation it's gonna be tho.

Vacations are expemsive and I have Stray Kids tickets to buy

Unfortunately. Driving a Uhaul down full of my parents' stuff and visiting my grandma before she dies

We talked about this the other night 🥺

How can I afford a vacation when I spend my extra money on you?

Vacations are expensive... i get a little extra money and i sirens it on you for a bit of serotonin

Vacations are expensive... i get a little extra money and i spend it on you for a bit of serotonin

I have done nothing today.

But right now, im making cheese bread. Cheesebread that is far too fancy for a lazy Sunday lol

Its currently in the air fryer

But I made a rosemary paremesan loaf earlier this week. And I marinated some fresh mozzarella overnight, so all I did was slice the bread, add the cheese, and now it's baking.

Yes?

Maybe you need a layover in Omaha on your way home...

🫣🫣

Hmm... how boldly do i want to answer that 🤔

Other than thinking about you and playing with myself, absolutely nothing

🫣 I can't think about anyone else...

Really?

Im just trying to get as much of you as I can while you let me

What's that for?

So you're into pathetic and desperate. note taken

🤣

Let me rephrase: attached? Obsessed?

Idk. Obsessed isn't right. But I am obsessed with how you make me feel

Not obsessed in a stalker way. Rest assured I won't be flirting across the country to track you down. But im absolutely obsessed with what I get with you here 🥹.

The possibility of you is better than the reality of someone else

Good. I wish i could see.

Stop with that.

What are you doing now?

Ok. I will leave you alone

Ill be waiting. As always

Ugh. I can't with you. You're too hot. 😭

I got on IG. Your newest post showed up

Sorry to bother you

I just couldn't resist saying something

I know you're out with friends tho. I do appreciate that you always respond, but i knew you were busy. I didn't expect a response so fast

I know. It makes me all smiley and blushy when I hear from you when I don't expect it. But I want you to know that I don't expect you to make time for me when you're busy. I also feel like I've been kinda boring lately. But I've been trying to just take a bit of a mental break with how much has been going on. Im just enjoying getting your attention

I am actually. Its been a good weekend. I haven't really had pressure for anything. Kinda lonely, but I've looked forward to your messages.

You make me happy... and time is the most important thing to me. You give me that 🥰

Are you still out with your friends?

Ok. Hope your having fun. Talk to me when you're free? Thanks for making time for me 🥰

Hey... I know this probably seems like it's coming out of nowhere, but im sorry. Im sorry for everything. I ended up on a reddit rabbit hole last night and ended up on a thread of OF creators complaining about their fans. I kinda felt like I'd been punched because im one of the kind of people they were complaining about the most - people who expect to keep taking and keep getting am experience, but refuse to, or can't pay for it. While I know you're here to make money, once we started taking, I just completely pushed aside that this is nothing more than a business transaction. I think I just didn't want to think about that part. But I've taken up so much of your time and expected so much from you that I haven't paid for. I've been sick all night and feel so guilty that I've basically stolen an "experience" from you and I think you're just too kind to set the boundaries or lower the expectations. I truly respect the amount of work that goes into keeping up an OF and being successful on this platform and im really sorry I took your time away from people who can more easily support you. I haven't really even contributed to your engagement since I dont comment publicly... I just feel like anything I have to say is between us and not for other people, but I realize that doesn't actually help at all. Im just really sorry.

Everything that any of the creators complained about was something that I do. 🥺 you're the first creator that I've followed. I didn't know that it was customary to tip every 2-3 messages. Or with how much i talk to you and lean on you, it's badically a "boyfriend experience" that I need to pay for. I dont comment publicly so it doesn't increase your engagement and likes don't really mean anything. I've talked getting together, and it's always just been daydreaming or fantasy, I've never been serious, but apparently it's super against TOS and could get your amount in trouble I should have done more research before I joined. I've helped a couple friends with photosshoots for theirs, so i do know how much work goes into it, but i goes i never really put much thought into the etiquette part of being a fan. I didn't realize i was being like, literally one of the worst ones. Im really, really sorry.

There was a whole post talking about how to set transactional boundaries for people who aren't tipping or buying consistently anymore and a lot of the advice was different ways to say that you appreciate their "support" in ways that makes them feel good and is also a hint that they need to get back to "supporting". I just don't pick up on clues. I've never been good at that and need things spelled out. It just really got me reading all the creators' complaints about their fans and realizing how many boxes I checked off. It made me feel really dumb for not realizing and really guilty for taking up so much of your time. I honestly didn't know that what im doing literally seems to be things that bothers creators the most. I've literally been crying typing out my apology because I feel so bad. I really like you and I got attached and carried away because I just really liked who you are, so to me it felt more like building a friendship and I honestly just put the "its business" part completely out of my mind. I do appreciate that you've always been here for me. But now I feel like I've just stolen months of your time.

I was busy typing all that even you sent your last message 🥺

It just got me thinking that you're too kind to easily set those financial boundaries and I honestly care about you and don't want to put you in a position where you have to

Then I guess now I'm sorry for bringing all this up. I just found the thread and realized that im exactly the type of person everyone is complaining about. It was more seeing myself in what they were saying, not about you. And im so used to being "the rule". I don't really know how to handle being the exception to the rule When we talk, to me, it's just me talking to someone important to me. Your presence is important... your friendship means the world to me. I don't think about you being a creator until there's content to consume and then i feel guilty about not being able to be a better supporter... this thread was kind of just the ultimate reminder of that.

I just never want you to feel like im trying to get "free" content from you. I just like YOU so much and its easy to get so wrapped up in your attention that I forget this is your business too.

I feel so guilty. My eyes hurt from crying so much

Easier said than done

Im not sure i know how

Lol. You know me better than that

I worry about everything

I feel like im wrong for even being here now though. And like I need to stop responding, but honestly I can't help it. Im kinda addicted. It all just got in my head

I sent you a $5.00 tip

You deserve so much more

I like you 🫣 I wish i could do more for you

Its okay to keep taking like we do ?

I want to more than anything

That sounds so comfy 😭

Have a good night 💖 Ill try to be better tomorrow 🥺

Good morning

Not so good. But thursday is the day I hopefully get my sleep meds back

No I meet with her on thursday

I hope so. Trying to stay positive about it. The only time I've been able to sleep the last 2 months is if I've been just completely exhausted

Too bad you haven't been here to help wear me out at night.... 😘

Work 😭

Bug you

Maybe work on my cross stitch. Im like halfway done with the top of Boss' head

What are you up to today?

I wanna be there

Can I hold you hostage in your bed?

I won't let you go...

We can put on your favorite show and stay in bed all day. I just want to be warm and comfy with your arms around me

It sounds so much better than setting up taxes.

I just wanna be with you and be lazy and not worry about the rest of the world. Just wrap myself around you and spend the day relaxing.

It sounds calm... and safe

That's vague... Umm it's cloudy and humid I have a client that is doing her best to anger me. If you ever have the urge to visit the Live Oak Canyon Pumpkin Farm in Yucaipa, please don't. They're terrible people. My Cirkul bottle is leaking and I can't figure out why. I don't want to buy a new one. My jar of stars is almost full and it's kinda cute. And im trying to make more time to work on things for me so i don't get so burnt out on things I feel pressure to complete. Except that also affects my income, so its kind of a slow process to get back to making/selling enough and finding a balance that I can handle

Almost full. It's kind of a dumb craft, but its cute for my desk

What are your plans for today??

I really don't have much going on in general. Im pretty lame. Every day is the same

I sent you a $5.00 tip under this post

Tell me something fascinating you'be learned

Tell me something fascinating you've learned recently?

I think i would d1e if you made direct eye contact with me...

I take that to mram it was a successful weekend then?

Im not sure that's any better...

I can't make eye contact on a normal basis... i don't think I could handle it from you

I think you mean 'weird'? 😅

I challenge that.

What do you think is the weirdest thing about you?

🥺

My company is doing this fundraiser for type 2 diabetes research... they handed out bags of candy with the flyers. I dont think they thought that through

We were also given golf hats. You know, for morale.

Raises might keep staff....

A raise would improve morale. So would a promotion, since im already doing the work of a team lead. My unit supervisor hates me though. My friend works in claims and they really want someone familiar with payroll on their team, so i want to try to switch departments when a position opens up

Right now, I'm just waiting. I've kinda decided that if I can't make any moves in the next 6 months, I'll start looking for a new job altogether